All Poems, Death, Family, In-laws, Loss, Love, Stories

It Was Simple

It was simple, the unveiling.

Four of us.

Come to honor Ethel.

Her daughter from Atlanta.

Despite illness, pain.

Needing wheelchairs in the airport.

Making the trip with her husband.

To reveal the stone.

Ethel’s son and I.

Meeting them at the cemetery.

Removing gauze.

To exhibit the plaque.

Designed by Ethel.

Long before she passed.

Review the original gilt words:

Kindred Spirits Me and Thee

In Life and in Eternity.

Binding her to Mac.

Each relishing a second chance at marital love.

Until Mac departed nineteen years later.

We studied details.

Like we would a sculpture.

Glad the display outdoors.

In the thick of Spring.

When gardens overflowed with azaleas, irises, columbines.

Trees hung heavy with lilacs, empress blooms, honeysuckle.

Aromas luring Ethel’s spirit toward us.

Under cypresses.

For she, too, wanted to see the piece.

Marking her resting place.

Was it done correctly?

Everything in order?

Reminding us that GiGi referred to great-grandmother.

Title earned later in life.

Her energy picking up like wind.

Eager to chime in familial anecdotes.

We circled around to listen

till Linda’s hands, chilled.

Then we bid farewell,

conversation stilled.

Lynn Benjamin

May 16, 2024

All Poems, Commemorations, Death, Family, Humor, In-laws

Unveiling Ethel’s Stone

Today, Ethel, the unveiling of your stone.

The one marking resting place with Mac.

Ceremony arranged by your children.

On time, as you would like it done.

Though I suspect you dreamed of fanfare.

A bit more pomp.

A grand parade of important people.

Grandchildren, older great grandchildren.

Large family gathering.

Like in days gone by.

To talk about you.

Remember when’s, exhort tell me mores.

Maybe outside among tulips, irises, forget-me-nots.

At big picnic tables.

Under a cloudless blue sky, sun shining.

Roses just beginning to bloom.

Diffuse their perfumes.

Cameras snapping all around.

Guests saying, wouldn’t Ethel love this celebration?

We miss her, wish she were here.

You would sense kavod flowing your way.

But, here we stand today.

A son, a daughter, each mate.

Paying you simple tribute.

Not wanting to complicate.

 

Lynn Benjamin

May 13, 2024

 

 

All Poems, Birthdays, Family, Food, Holidays, Humor, In-laws, Passover, Stories

Ethel Always Wanted

Ethel always wanted a place in my kitchen.

Especially at Passover.

The springtime feast.

One she used to prepare herself till she handed it to me.

Some forty-five years ago.

A complicated celebration with many dishes, courses.

Seder plate with Haroseth.

A make-ahead paste symbolizing mortar.

Used by Jewish slaves to build pyramids.

Gefilte fish.

Matzah ball soup.

Entrée and vegetables.

Desserts galore.

An elaborate menu to be sure.

But, one I preferred to prepare alone.

Set the table for solo.

Making little place cards.

Placing wine glasses.

Clearing a spot for Elijah.

Today, though, I had no choice.

She accompanied me in the kitchen.

A yahrzeit candle lit for her birthday.

On the day chosen to prepare matzoh balls.

Wrap and freeze them.

For the soup on Pesach.

I tripled the recipe.

Eggs, matzoh meal, seltzer, salt, pepper.

Refrigerated the bowl before shaping balls.

Dropping them into simmering water.

The process, going well.

Ethel watching from her perch.

Saying nothing.

Not criticizing.

Not yammering.

Not competing.

Till I filled my eight-quart pot in the sink with water.

Lifted it to set upon the stovetop.

Not quite reaching the target.

Slamming it against the heavy metal burner.

Splashing water everywhere.

Filling the cooking surface like a swimming pool.

I turned my eyes to the candle.

Still burning, looking intently.

Grabbed a towel to mop the mess.

Heard a quiet laugh.

Chiding me for not using a pitcher.

To fill the pot on the stove.

An excellent point.

Though I wished she hadn’t witnessed my mistake.

But, I acknowledged her assessment.

And though the project, delayed,

in the end, sixty balls fluffed up.

Floating to the top, homemade.

Lynn Benjamin

April 21, 2024

All Poems, Birthdays, Family, Gardens, Homages, Humor, In-laws, Philadelphia, Stories, Trips and Places

April Tulips

Only last summer, I went to Amsterdam.

Known for its tulip harvest.

But, by July, it was over.

Though I spotted a few.

Likely cultivated late for tourists.

Yesterday, though, I happened upon dozens.

On street corners in Philadelphia.

Pink, yellow, red, lavender, variegated beauties.

Show stoppers halting me in my tracks.

Their mouths open, heads tilted upwards.

As if in prayer or conversation.

I wondered to whom they whispered.

Could it be Ethel, my mother-in-law?

For she thought them divine.

So, I moved closer.

Thinking I might overhear the exchange.

Perhaps Ethel boasting her birthday, the next day.

For she expected homage be paid her.

Tulips likely answering, we bloomed for you.

Heralding spring and your ninety-ninth.

Along with daffodils, hyacinths, irises.

Bringing to earth repose.

Little spaces to find relief.

From political angst.

Environmental woes.

Savage global wars.

She, like I, mesmerized.

Her voice fading in the rustle of a breeze.

Back from where she came.

Tulips equally enthralled,

awed by the grande dame.

Lynn Benjamin

April 14, 2024

Ethel’s birthday was on April 11th. Had she lived, she would have been ninety-nine.

All Poems, Birthdays, Family, Humor, In-laws, Time

Daylight Saving and Manny

 

Today my father-in-law, Manny, would turn one hundred.

He would like the ring of that number.

The sound of the word century.

But likely, he would wrinkle his nose at Daylight Saving.

Falling smack on his birthday.

Robbing him of an hour’s rest.

Disrupting meal time schedules.

Interfering with circadian rhythms.

Changing established patterns.

Losing light in the morning.

Never mind light lingering later.

He’d ask, what about babies?

Rising earlier, waking parents?

But, Manny wouldn’t trouble himself long.

He’d just adjust the way he viewed it.

While many anguish over loss of time,

our Manny would wryly smile,

collecting all the hours stolen

to store in an age saving pile.

 

Lynn Benjamin

March 10, 2024

All Poems, Art/Arts, Family, Holidays, In-laws, Jewish Holidays, Loss

Almost a Year

 

It’s almost a year since my mother-in-law passed.

This, the first Chanukah without her.

Festival of Lights, her favorite.

Chanting prayers around the menorah.

Grandchildren by her side.

A familiar print on the wall.

Right in her dining room.

Now ours, on the landing.

As you ascend the stairs.

One of those things admired.

Never asked about.

Till now, too late.

Wishing you knew the back story.

When she bought it.

Where?

Why?

Portrait of eight indigenous children.

Circling a grand menorah.

Lit and glowing.

The artist’s signature, bottom right.

DeGrazia, Arizona.

Dated, 1980.

So, I googled him.

Found the number for DeGrazia Gallery in Tucson.

Talked to Lance, who identified the work.

Called Hanukah!

Pointing out the saguaro cactus at the bottom left.

Explaining the children from Papago tribes.

Overjoyed with a gift from Ethel

whose presence I could feel.

Come to share an anecdote.

Her way to reappear.

 

Lynn Benjamin

December 8, 2023

All Poems, Death, Family, In-laws, Plants

Peace Lily

 

A peace lily rests by the window.

Given us to remember Bob’s mother.

After her passing in February.

Just before her 97th birthday.

Bringing to mind her love of children.

Tradition.

Beach.

Requiring special care.

Misting, moisturizing, placing in a sink with water.

Hiring a person to tend to it while away.

But, once full summer sprawls, the plant goes outside.

To soak in humidity.

Enjoy August rains.

For a peace lily is tropical.

Thrives in heat.

Grows green, lush, strong.

Protecting florets behind white hoods.

Ethel would surely smile.

Her spirit, blooming in a plant.

To her, presence was essential.

In her pot, now transcendent.

 

Lynn Benjamin

August 29, 2023

 

All Poems, Family, In-laws, Philadelphia, Thank-You, Trips and Places

La Bohème, To Ethel

 

I am certain, Ethel, you were with us.

In that empty seat on the aisle.

Listening to, watching La Bohème.

For you adored opera.

Encouraged us, maybe coerced us, to go.

Many years ago.

When work and children were obstacles.

To see Turandot in New York.

You persisted.

Bought tickets.

Derived pleasure from our attendance.

Perhaps, then, more than we.

Though we appreciated the opportunity.

But, this time, we chose to go.

To the Academy of Music.

Orchestra, dialogue, stagecraft.

Colorful chorus scenes, passion.

Director Yuval Sharon’s inverted version.

Last scene, first.

First, last.

Turning it into a psychological study.

What choices did protagonists make?

That led them to their fates?

Ethel, you might have preferred the original.

Fancy staging and intermission.

But you’d be pleased we wanted to go.

Your desire come to fruition!

 

Lynn Benjamin

May 9, 2023

All Poems, Family, Holidays, In-laws, Jewish Holidays, Loss

Setting Tables

 

Pesach is upon us.

Time to set tables.

Why? you might ask.

Why is setting Pesach tables different from setting tables on other holidays?

The symbolic Seder plate?

Salt water, egg, bone, parsley, bitter herbs, charoseth?

Matzah platters?

Multiple courses?

Soup, fish, main dish, vegetables, salad, desserts?

Wine glasses?

Water glasses?

Invitation to Elijah?

Haggadahs for everyone?

A complicated arrangement.

Unique from other festivals.

So distinguished, my mother-in-law annually phoned.

The day prior to Pesach.

To offer to set the tables.

More to beseech, implore, press.

A call I anticipated.

Discouraging her.

Telling her I could do it myself.

And would.

In my own time.

But now, she’s gone.

Missing Pesach by only months.

Turning ninety-eight during the holiday.

I know she’s with us.

Wanting to set tables.

With every fork and spoon

on the cloths I lay,

I hear Ethel’s voice.

My turn to beg: entrez.

 

Lynn Benjamin

April 11, 2023

(Ethel’s birthday)

 

All Poems, Birthdays, Family, In-laws

To Ethel on her 90th Birthday

 

Ninety is a time to smile.
To celebrate.
Hold close those you love.
Together rewind the years.
Watch them unfold again.
Childhood, motherhood.
Career years, love story.
Toast accumulated letdowns, triumphs.

You arrive to the present
On wings of memories.
Impossible to share each one.
Continuing to have experiences.
That you will recall tomorrow.

So please, slow down the clock.
Take stock today.

Your children.
Grandchildren.
Great grandchildren.
Carriers in their bones of your legacy.
All here.

The precious progeny most people dream of.
You have beside you.
They are heirs.
Recording, fulfilling your wishes.

Embrace joy.
Honor family and friends.
Prize, inspire children.
Be kind to canines.
Value community, perform mitzvot.
Chant with zest our Jewish songs.
Seek wisdom, and let it guide you.
Sow kavod along whatever path you take.

Ethel, we recognize you on this 90th anniversary.
Also, commemorating Mac, your brothers.
Your parents,  grandparents and theirs.
Drawing them hither to this gathering around you.

Today is, indeed, the circle of life manifest.
Linking past, present, and future generations.
Whom we charge to carry out your lessons.
With grace, propriety, piety compassion.

Infuse the day with honey, spice.
Let us all preserve its sweet taste, fragrant aroma.
Its near perfect consistency.

Love and hugs,

Lynn

April 11, 2015